May 31, 2004
taking a deep breath
I had pancakes today. Two of them, whole wheat with strawberries on top.
Eve ran the point of the shears along her jawline, watching the indentation in the mirror, the contrast of skin and steel. She breathed out slowly, as the coldness warmed. To the point of her chin, and then beneath, pressing them into the soft spot behind bone and slitting her eyes. The girl pushed them in harder, drawing them down over her windpipe to rest in the hollow of her collarbone. The white line blushed red, and she smiled.
I've now rewritten three of the first four chapters of...well, its new working title is Deconstructing Sylvia. And I have to say, I didn't expect that changing one thing would change so much of the story. I have whole sections I knew I was going to have to get rid of, but other things...there are whole chapters that will have to be completely rewritten or dropped. I'm suddenly unsure about my structure, and second guessing myself. And I'm finding out new things, getting reacquainted with characters I thought I knew, but who have changed in my absence. It's a very different experience, this way.
I have a problem, in that I write very episodically. I'm not sure how to change that, but I'll try. I am trying. But it's...good, because I needed to come at the whole thing from a fresh perspective, and this is it. This is new, and different, and a little scary. I found out today that Eve has a stepmother, and her father drinks too much. And I realized that there is going to be porn, which gives me a whole new level of nervousness. I also found out that Sylvia is shorter than his mother, and that his father always regretted what he did to Arlene.
And if none of this makes sense to you, that's all right. I'm just working things out in my head.
May 29, 2004
carmencita
Tonight, I saw the worst opera that I've seen in....ages. Not bad because of the production, per se. It was nothing like the one that made my mother and I nearly claw our eyes out, or those that we flee from halfway through because Mozart was a crackwhore about writing the same line over and over and over again. No, this one just...sucked.
It was miscast, with the hero old and fat and bored, and the leading lady old and...not a dancer, which was so wrong because it was a huge part of her character, who sucked. I mean, she really sucked. She wasn't even singing with the beat. She lagged behind, and she's supposed to be a professional.
When intermission rolled around, it turned out that both of us were trying really hard not to fall asleep, so we left. And I came home.
I got my Willow's today! And they're soooo pretty. White Witch Willow has these silvery spots on her shirt and mmmm and Vamp Willow has blood dripping from her mouth and I love them love them.
Tomorrow, I have to get up early to take evilCat to the vet, and then we have to clean up the yard, and I have to clean my room, and we have to go to the bank, and I need to go to Sherwin Williams and buy paint. All of this makes me feel very tired. I think I may go to bed.
May 26, 2004
it rains
Our dining room is leaking.
It's been raining all day, on and off. Mostly on. And it seems we do have hail damage to the roof, since dinner was inturrupted by drips. My brother's car looks terrible - like someone hit it over and over with...well, little balls of ice, I guess. I'm really amazed the windshield didn't break. I think we're going to be raking for a week to get up all the leaves, but even with all of this I can't get over the amazement. These are the storms gods are born from.
It's going to rain until sunday. Hopefully by then I'll have a job.
In other news: My Willows are on their way! ::squee::
bruised roses
It had been getting dark for, perhaps, three hours. The sky turned that lovely yellowish color that means you'll probably spend twenty minutes in the basement, wondering if the tornado siren has gone off yet. And then, as I was speaking to my mother on the phone and watching the rain pour down in sheets, I heard a clatter. And another. I had a moment to realize it was hailing, and then it became a roar, and the whole world turned to ice and whirling, torn leaves.
After the storm I opened the front door, and the smell of crushed vegetation hit me hard. Mist boiled up from down the hill, and soon I could see nothing beyond our own yard, which had become a magical shattered world to explore.
I don't think anything was broken that won't grow back or be repaired, but I will never forget it - the noise and the feeling of attack, and exhilaration.
Once upon a long, long ago, there was a beautiful princess. She sat in the grandest room of the grandest palace of the grandest kingdom, and there she supped on berries and cream every day. The princess was attended by a hundred maidens, raised for the very purpose of amusing her. Her parents had died when she was very young, and her visir ruled the kingdom in her stead, until the day she would decide to take up her duty.
And generally, it was an existence that pleased her very much, but one day the princess awoke from her midmorning slumber, and realized something. She was bored. And more than that, she had been bored, for days upon days. For perhaps as far back as she could remember, though it was difficult to say. That day, the princess called for her greatest magician.