palace of winds

I woke this morning shortly after five with a roaring headache. Which is odd, since the cure for my headaches is sleep. Silly body. So I have been pampering myself — it’s a glasses day, a comfy cami day, an extra morning cup of tea day, a toast with strawberry jam day. A day of again vaguely wanting to return to Moxie to tell my stylist he rocks and to thank him for giving me a haircut that requires only a brief shower, a quick towel-dry, and a few finger flicks, and then is content to be left to its own devices.

Last night I had my parents over for dinner (spinach salad with strawberries and walnuts, saffron risotto), and then I dragged them down to Jamba Juice. The weather was beautiful. Summer has decided abruptly to arrive, and has been bathing us in relentless gorgeousness since late last week. There have been moments when the heat has become a little oppressive, a hot heavy still presence, but it is worth it a thousandfold when I stand at my kitchen window and the wind breathes in cool and smelling sweet and rich. Bringing deep-down happy. Moments that are worth everything.

I spent Saturday with my sister, which was lovely, and Sunday and Monday working with my dad on our secret project, which was equally lovely. Particularly since it meant I was outside almost all day both days, and with highs of 97 and 94 respectively I feel I’ve more or less baked winter out of my bones. Sleeping has been an adjustment; I feel like I’m back at school in those sweltering late August days, just me and the low whir of the fan coaxing sleep, waiting through the dull press of heat.

I feel a little like I’m waking up. I can’t stop being quietly happy, smiling at odd moments. Is it possible to love weather? Is it possible to love possibility? My capacity for creation, that weird vague wanting to weave and build and make, that feeling which has been waning since Christmastime, is back. All I see any more are beginnings. If I had twice the time I could not begin to slake this longing. I feel like a proper Leo lion girl, sun setting me roaring.